sufferably | ( i've been working on a cocktail called grounds for divorce )

Dear Leonard,

If you have a moment sometime soon, there's something about which I would like to speak to you (over the network is fine).

With affection,
Evelyn

You don't have to sound so serious, Evelyn.

Unless it is serious...?

[By her standards, she was being rather informal--but letter-writing expectations vary rather severely between worlds, she's found. Some people here never bother with salutations at all.]

No, it's not--or, at least, I hope it isn't. [There's a nervous, sheepish quality to her voice; she'd hoped to conduct this conversation entirely through writing, but she couldn't find the words for it when she attempted to compose an answer.]

You were honest with me regarding your past, and I think I need to do the same. [She takes a deep breath.] On that adventure of mine, there was a--a man who accompanied us, and we--it isn't as though we had any kind of understanding, of course, I wouldn't...not if we did. [Her voice grows quieter.] But we might have, had I stayed in my own world.

[But if she lingers too long on the thought of Rick, she won't finish this. She clears her throat, preparing to barrel on.] But I've been here for months now, and no one's ever shown up from home--and honestly, I don't know if I'll ever see Egypt again, let alone him. And you're here now, and I'd--I care about you, and--

[and if everything ends, I don't want to die unloved. But she can't quite say it, and that's likely for the best. If this entire mess of an answer hasn't already sent him running in the opposite direction, that surely would.]

--And I want to be fair to you. Which I think means you ought to know about...all that. [Pause.] I hope this isn't, er, more than you cared to know, or...well, otherwise untoward to mention.

( his first reaction-- which he knows is incorrect to act on, at least-- is to laugh. because all the women he's been interested in in his life have always been so in-control, so ready to direct whatever semblance of relationships he'd had with them. so the fact that evelyn isn't doing that, and is in fact fumbling over things as well, sets something light going in his chest that he can't really control.

but he doesn't laugh, thank god. )

He's not gonna try and kick my ass if he shows up here, right?

( he doesn't know if he's really up to some kind of misguided battle of chivalry. )

[If he laughed, she might never forgive him.

Well--she'd forgive him eventually, but she'd be embarrassed beyond belief to realize that what seemed like a very real concern to her looked like a joke a century or two on.

And yet, his response is curiously deadpan enough that she's tempted to chuckle. Is that really all he's concerned about?]

I haven't the faintest idea. If he shows up...I don't know what's going to happen at all. Honestly, we hadn't done more than kiss-- [She cuts herself off, a bit embarrassed. Evy doesn't know a lot about these sorts of things, but don't tell your new beau about what you got up to with your old one seems like a fairly obvious rule.] Well, saved each others' lives, I suppose, but at this point, I've known you as long as I'd known him.

[If she keeps talking, she's only going to put her foot in it more. Wrap it up, Evelyn, you're sounding like a fool.] If he tries, I'll stop him.

( it occurs to bones that he hasn't saved evy's life, especially not when it would have counted. and they're here, where danger lurks behind every corner, and nothing he can do will keep her safer. he's no hero, in that way.

but he can't help but smile, even if she can't see it. )

I can't doubt that.

You've got nothing to worry about on my end, just so you know. Though if an ex of mine shows up she might warn you off me entirely.

( he wouldn't blame her for listening to those warnings, either, but he manages to say it lightly. )

All right. Er, good.

[There's palpable relief there. Things seem so much simpler where Leonard's from (or perhaps they're merely simpler in his mind); she could easily imagine other men backing off at her explanation, for any number of reasons, and he's taken it entirely in stride.

She knew she liked him.]

I doubt anyone could warn me off. You might not know it, but I can be a bit obstinate. [His reaction's cheered her enough that she can tease him back now.]

Really? I wouldn't have thought it.

( although, if he was being flowery about it, her persistence is one of things he does admire about her. )

I convinced you to take a nap when you were having nothing of the sort. [She laughs.] Now imagine if we'd been arguing about something important.

I'll have you know that I've been taking lessons on digging in my heels. You might be in for a harder battle, next time.

Oh, really? And who's been teaching those?

A surgeon who lives here. It's how he's planning on getting around some draft, apparently.

Or, a five-year-old. I hear they're real good at that sorta thing.

I'll have to take a few extra lessons myself, then--mustn't let you outpace me.

Oh--while I've got hold of you, I ought to mention that we might have to put dinner off a bit. [Must be circumspect, mustn't attract the gods' attention, but she doesn't want to disappear without telling him if he isn't planning on going on the upcoming expedition.] I've business out of the city in a day or two.

( he pauses, then says carefully: ) This wouldn't happen to be a trip with a few friends, would it?

It would--I hadn't realized you'd heard about it.

It seems like it might be worth something.

I was thinking about tagging along.

I think so, too. [And surely it can't be worse than the last trip out to Ginnungagap.] It'd be nice to have you there--we might have need of a doctor.

Other than the Doctor, you mean? ( he still doesn't get that name. )

I think it'd be an experience, going on an expedition with you.

They aren't proper medical doctors. I'd rather have someone who's taken the Hippocratic Oath.

[That makes her laugh.] And this one should be quite the adventure. Do come with.

I guess I will, then.

( plus, he's been thinking there'll be no way to keep jim out of this. )

Good. I suppose I'll see you then.

Take care, in the meantime.

You, too.

( i've been working on a cocktail called grounds for divorce )

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